{"id":25,"date":"2005-11-15T15:45:00","date_gmt":"2005-11-15T19:45:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/?p=25"},"modified":"2022-01-02T07:40:11","modified_gmt":"2022-01-02T12:40:11","slug":"bad-eye-joke-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/?p=25","title":{"rendered":"Bad Eye Joke #1"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/wp-content\/blogger\/phoropter.0.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/wp-content\/blogger\/phoropter.0.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"270\" height=\"179\" align=\"left\" \/><\/a>Mr. Smith was on his death bed and knocking at the Pearly Gates. He called his son to his bedside and made one final request.<\/p>\n<p>In a raspy voice, he asked, &#8220;Son, I&#8217;ll be gone soon, but before I go, there&#8217;s one of the Great Questions of Life that I must have answered. Please go get Dr. Jones.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>His son looked at his father in confusion; Dr. Jones was the town optometrist, the last person in the world, it seemed, who could do his father any good. But the son was eager to fulfill his father&#8217;s dying wish, so off he went to fetch Dr. Jones who was in the middle of a refraction when the son burst into the exam room.<!--more--><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Doctor Jones,&#8221; he exclaimed, &#8220;my father is about to die and requests that you come to his bedside to answer one of the Great Questions of Life!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Doctor Jones, although thinking that perhaps Mr. Smith needed a priest more than an optometrist, agreed to go nonetheless, figuring that somehow he could charge for a housecall and bill Medicare for a little extra.<\/p>\n<p>Once there, Dr. Jones addressed the dying man, &#8220;I&#8217;ve come as you requested, Mr. Smith, what can I possibly do for you in this, the hour of your severest trial?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>With a look of relief, Mr. Smith replied, &#8220;Doc, before I go (cough, gasp), I just have to ask you one question: Which choice really <em>was<\/em> better, one or two?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><!--630d69212a9db3068a05acb6cb275748--><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Mr. Smith was on his death bed and knocking at the Pearly Gates. He called his son to his bedside and made one final request. In a raspy voice, he asked, &#8220;Son, I&#8217;ll be gone soon,&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[36,44],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-25","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-eyes","category-humor"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=25"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9165,"href":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25\/revisions\/9165"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=25"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=25"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ocularfusion.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=25"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}