Category: Nostalgia

There Ain’t No More Lead In The Pencil

While rummaging through the attic of my memories last week, I stumbled across another long-lost treasure.

Most residents in the nursing home where I worked during college had long since given up on any more hanky-panky and directed their remaining physical and mental energies toward more fundamental aspects of survival, such as chewing slowly without choking and making sure they didn’t throw off their pacemakers by getting a little too close to the microwave.

But there were a few who were hanging on tight and had a reputation for being real pistols. Especially that retired banker who use to “make his rounds” each day as he slowly pushed his walker from one nurse’s station to another.… Read the rest

Want Respect? Earn It

I was 28-years-old when I graduated from optometry school and finally gained that long sought after title of “doctor.” No more “scut work” for me, I thought. “Let respect flow like a river, and money like a mighty stream” was my motto.

Oh, if only it had been that simple. We moved to Nashville where I started a residency in ocular disease at a large ophthalmology clinic and referral center near Vanderbilt. One of the first patients that I saw in the clinic there stared at me in disbelief when I walked into the room and declared, “And what high school did you just graduate from?”… Read the rest

How I Became An Eyeguy; Or, It’s All In The Wrist

Regarding the various times that I worked construction jobs while in school, there are really only two words that need to be said.

I’m sorry.

Sorry for the outlet covers that were put on upside down, sorry for the insulation that wasn’t stapled in correctly, sorry for that door that just won’t shut quite right.

In numerous subdivisions and neighborhoods throughout the Southeast United States, homeowners are starting to do a double take at some of the so-called “quality craftsmanship” of their suburban executive homes and declare: “Who the @%#$&*! put this thing together?!”

Uh, that would be me, and I like I said, I’m sorry.… Read the rest

How I Learned To Speak Fluent Geezer

These days when college students come home and seek out summer jobs, there’s a good chance that they’ll find themselves doing what has become the Main Task Of The Day, without which life as we know it would cease to exist: Data Entry.

Tippity-tap-tippity-tap. It has not always been that way, though.

In the summers following my freshman and sophomore years of college, I worked as an orderly at a nursing home in Rocky Mount, Virginia. Looking back, it’s hard to believe that they would hire a skinny, inexperienced 19-year-old kid for a job that involved providing direct patient care to a very sick and fragile population.… Read the rest

4/22/80

On Tuesday, April 22, 1980, the following events occurred:

Pennsylvania primary takes place today…..PA poll shows George Bush leading Ronald Reagan, while President Carter and Sen. Ted Kennedy are in dead heat…..European Community decides to support Carter’s sanctions against Iran…..State Dept. sends telegrams to hostage families urging them to abide by ban on travel to Iran…..International Olympic Committee, meeting in Switzerland, undecided about Moscow Olympics boycott…..Canada urges it’s Olympic committee to cancel plans to attend Summer Games…..In Liberia, officials of former government are executed…..Harold Brown (not Carter’s SecDef nor the inventor of the electric chair) dies in Roanoke, Virginia at the age of 47…..House

… Read the rest

A Few Final Four Thoughts

A few Final Four thoughts:

  • The Davidson bubble was bound to burst at some point, but wasn’t that some kind of run?
  • There was something delightfully retro about watching Stephen Curry and his band of undersized, underappreciated major conference reject brothers taking it the big boys. It reminded me of the ACC and Southern Conference basketball of my 1960s-70s youth before everything got oh-so-complicated and fancy.
  • I loved getting reacquainted with Dell Curry and his lovely wife Sonya this weekend. What a class act. And Christian to boot. It’s not hard to see why their sons are turning out so good.
… Read the rest

I’m a Davidson Man

Duke’s done, but after the requisite 24-hour grieving period, I’ve done switched to another team. I’m now a Davidson Man:

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That’s about how much my bracket is worth after week one: 15 cents

Number One and I visited Davidson’s lovely campus before his senior year of high school, so I feel I can lay somewhat of a claim. Also, I actually saw Stephen Curry’s dad Dell play when I was a grad student at Virginia Tech. That makes me old enough to be Stephen’s father, which, on this Monday morning, is just another depressing thought to contemplate.

Oh well. Go Wildcats!… Read the rest

Wherefore Art Thou Romeo? Because He Has To

Today, Number Three Son is going through the same rite of passage that millions of other schoolboys have over the past few centuries. His 9th grade English class is covering Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet,” and Number Three gets to dress the part and deliver such choice lines as:

“See, how she leans her cheek upon her hand!
O, that I were a glove upon that hand,
That I might touch that cheek!”

As to “Juliet,” well, that’s a sore point. According to Number Three (who has been known to lay it on thick on occasion), he got stuck with the loudest, largest, and most obnoxious girl in the class, which will make his assignment all the more challenging.… Read the rest

It’s March–Cry Havoc and Let Slip the Devils of Duke!

Now that we have that little business out of the way, on to the main event.

Longtime Fusioneers know I bleed Blue Devil Blue. Those who have been around a shorter time might be wondering what all the fuss is about. Well, you can get up to speed here.

For me, there is something lower brain and purely primeval about Duke v. UNC. Since the early 1970s, I’ve only missed a few of those titan tussles. This year’s regular season finale Saturday night promises another instant classic: ACC regular season title on the line, Senior Night at Cameron with DeMarcus Nelson playing his last home game, UNC ranked #1, Henderson and Psycho T Hansbrough eyeing each other warily during warm ups, the Cameron Crazies in a deep blue frenzy, Roy Williams and Coach K commanding their troops.… Read the rest

Nice Shot, Navy

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Whether you agree with it or not, you have to admit it was a nice shot.

As someone who briefly held the high score on the Space Invaders machine at University Mall in Blacksburg, Virginia in early 1985, my hat’s off to you, Navy. Somewhere, Wernher von Braun is smiling. And I suspect, so are many of my top-secret rocket scientist friends in Huntsville.

Maybe you guys could help Duke find the basket too. Or at least a little earlier in the game anyway.… Read the rest

Why I Hate Kentucky

There’s only thing that makes my heart gladder than a Duke win, and that would be a Kentucky loss. In this case, the major whuppin’ at the hands of the Vanderbilt Commodores last night.

Whence comes my ire? Oh, the general cockiness–and the 1978 NCAA final didn’t help. But the biggest reason is related to eyes.

In the summer of 1990, I was a resident in ocular disease at a large clinic in Nashville. I wasn’t sure where I would go after that, so I was in the process of obtaining several state licenses to broaden my options. I thought at the time that Kentucky sounded kinda nice and wasn’t far and that I might be able to find a post-residency position somewhere in The Bluegrass State.… Read the rest

Scandalous Stuff

Just a reminder for those of you in the Huntsville area, my 2nd Sunday column will appear in the Forum section of The Huntsville Times this week. I’ll post a link to the online edition as soon as it’s available.

This one will contain many embarrassing tidbits from my past (and present), flashes of 1970s nostalgia, sexual innuendo galore, the usual soaring prose laced with biting humor, Eyegal in all her beauty, glorious, never-before-seen metaphors along with a salute (sort of) to a certain upcoming holiday. All kinds of scandalous stuff, really.

Now that I have your attention, I hope you’ll read it.… Read the rest

When Life Imitates Art

The phone rang, per usual, at the start of dinner. Probably just another solicitor, I thought.

But then I saw the caller ID: “Walker, Texas Ranger.” It was a solicitor all right, but it occurred to me that this was one that I had better talk to. Or else.

“Howdy. This is Walker, Texas Ranger. No really, it’s Chuck Norris, just calling to put in a word for my good friend, Mike Huckabee. When you go to the polls on Tuesday, remember, Huck is the only true conservative in the field. So, if you want to protect our country from another Soviet invasion, remember–Vote Mike Huckabee!”… Read the rest