Monday Morning Meltdowns

It’s Monday, and hopefully yours is off to a good start. But if it’s not, perhaps I can lend you some much needed perspective with a few Monday morning meltdowns gleaned from fan boards and blogs over the past couple of days. First up, an Ole Miss fan accepts the inevitable:

“We are not today, tomorrow, next week, next century in a position to be competing for conference or national championships in any sport. Period. End of Story. Take it to the bank. Put it in your pipe and smoke it. We can be competitive, but not champions.”

Over in Hawgville, things aren’t any better:

“Yet here we are again, after yet another blowout, and the same old yada,yada,yada. I not going to talk about the game or what took place. It is the same game played 3 weeks in a row.”

The Vols picked up a little momentum with a 13-9 squeaker over Northern Illinois, but still, that’s not enough for some people:

“We’re the only team in the SEC East that does not control its own destiny. OMG… Vandy and Kentucky control their own destiny. ‘It’s the end of the world as we know it.’”

Down on The Plains, the Barners are restless in the wake of Auburn’s loss to Vandy, their first to the ‘Dores since the Eisenhower administration. Here’s a juicy one:

“This game versus Vandy tonight was an ABSOLUTE emberassment! If not for our defense we would not have won any games this season….Tony Franklin is sabotaging out football team. We have so much talent on our team and he is single-handedly sending this season down the toilet. Tommy Tub needs to GET RID OF TONY FRANKLIN ASAP….like tonight….before the bus pulls out of Nashville. We can salvage this season; our boys CAN do it. We’re going to have to get rid of Tony Franklin first!! He’s not Auburn material-he’s a pathetic excuse for an offensive coordinator.”

It wasn’t just the Auburn fans, though. Here’s Auburn’s receiver Rod Smith on the game:

“I don’t know what we are right now – the spread, old Auburn offense. I’m just really confused right now. Everybody is confused.”

Yikes. But that’s not all. This from Auburn part-time QB Kodi Burns after the game:

“We’ve got to figure something out. This — man, I don’t know. This isn’t the Auburn I saw when I was recruited. This isn’t the Auburn I saw last year. I don’t know what’s going on. We’ve got to figure something out.”

Wow. When some of your top players are sounding off like that in the locker room after a loss, the ship is taking on water and starting to list.

Meanwhile, down in T-town, the Tide takes some hits from the Wildcats, guts out a tough one and sails on. This from Coach Saban, not one to dish out compliments lightly:

“These guys have done a heck of a job to get where they are…Say what you want about our team, but I’ll bet you there weren’t very many people in this room betting that they’d be 6-0 right now. I’m not sure I would have bet it either, if you want to know the truth about it.”

Atta way to fire up the troops, Nick.

But I’ve saved the messiest meltdown for last. This from a world-weary Cubs fan:

“Even better than seeing Pinella and Hendry fired would be for MLB to put this pitiful, disgusting, loser franchise out of its existence. There really should be a rule that if you can’t win one $@^%&* World Series in 100 years, then you don’t get to exist anymore. There should be a price to pay for such incompetence and ineptitude. Absolute losers. How many wasted hours have I put into these clown frauds the past 29 years. I hope Wrigley burns to the ground. 29 years of being a die hard fan of this joke of a team — there won’t be a 30th year. All the shirts and hats are going in the garbage. Not another dime on anything related to this team. No more watching the games, no more reading the papers, no more checking the stats. I’m sick and tired of being let down.”

There, feel better now?

  1. That Girl

    FREE KODI!!!

  2. Mike the Redneck

    Thahutt’s a good ‘un, TG!

  3. whoopigsooie

    I hear TT is installing bullet-proof glass in the box upstairs to protect TF…and that’s so Tommy doesn’t shoot him!!!
    Hey TF…the CFL called; they want their offense back.
    You heard it here first…Hogs win 5 of their next 7 games.

  4. Mike the Eyeguy

    Oh, to be a fly on the wall of that household…

    Recall this moment from a certain interview, just a few weeks ago…

    MTEG: Are you concerned about Auburn’s new “Spread Eagle” Offense?

    MTRN: The only kind of “Spread Eaglin’” that worries me is the kind the Poe-leece been doin’ ’round kampus on some of our boys, like Jimmy Johns, back durin’ the off season. Naw, I aint’ worried ’bout them thar’ Barners and their phancy skeems and names and whatnot. They’s jist tryin’ to impress folks. Well, good luck with thahutt, I say.

    Good luck, indeed.

  5. Mike the Redneck

    Hey, I pre-she-ate the shout out thar, Eyeguy!

  6. Mike the Eyeguy

    Don’t mention it.

  7. mmlace


    Dr, Eyeguy, when you start having a conversation with yourself on here…

    I begin to wonder if you don’t have just a WEE BIT too much time on your hands…

  8. Laurie

    I read the headline and thought this was going to be about the stock market.

  9. Stoogelover

    Great reading … makes me all the more grateful that I’m not a football fan. I just look at scores … seldom watch the games. I do enjoy reading that Auburn has lost and Bama has won, but that has more to do with southern religion than it does sports, don’t you think?

  10. Mike the Eyeguy

    Hey Arky, there really are two of us…

    Laurie, I thought about that too yesterday morning as I watch my live savings take another nosedive and almost commented on it. Oh well, I still have my Bama ball cap. What more does a man need?

    Stoogie, speaking of religion, I was humming “It Is Well With My Soul” right before that last KY onsides kick. The way that thing flew out of bounds just like it had wings–that was no accident.

  11. mmlace


    Sure there are…

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