Found Jesus? Part II

Bad boy Billy Ray finally came forward for baptism at a Church of Christ in L.A. (Lower Alabama). Preacher and the whole con-gree-gay-shun rushed down to the river before Billy Ray changed his mind.

Preacher put him under quickly, making sure that all body parts were completely covered by the cleansing flood. He held Billy Ray under a right smahutt time, sews it would take real good and all.

Finally, he lifted Billy Ray out of the water. “Have you found Jesus?” Preacher asked.

Gagging and spitting, Billy Ray tried to reply but couldn’t before Preacher did something highly unorthodox for a Church of Christ evangelist–he put him under again.

“Have you found JEEESUS?” Preacher shouted a second time after lifting the now pale Billy Ray out of the water.

And, once again, Billy Ray could only clear his lungs and catch one short breath before Preacher dunked him for the third time.

Now a little exasperated and peeved, Preacher asked again, “I say, have you found Jesus yet?” This time, Billy Ray managed to choke out his reply.

“Well, no Preacher (cough, gag), I haven’t. But are you sure this is the spot where he went down?”

One Comment
  1. Mike the Eyeguy

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