Artificial Tears Are Good. Natural Tears Are Better

A tip o’ the hat to fellow optometrist and nation’s servant Lt. Col Hal who passed on this fine article, “The Vision Thing,” from Christianity Today.

Artificial tears are the workhorse of eye care. I’ll tell you what I tell my students and patients–when all else fails, lubricate, lubricate, lubricate. It’s really not a question of if you have dry eyes, but how dry are they and how much do they bother you? Our modern lifestyle, especially all the time we spend in front of computer screens, contributes greatly to the surge of dry eye that I’ve seen over the past 20 years.… Read the rest

Nice Shot, Navy

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Whether you agree with it or not, you have to admit it was a nice shot.

As someone who briefly held the high score on the Space Invaders machine at University Mall in Blacksburg, Virginia in early 1985, my hat’s off to you, Navy. Somewhere, Wernher von Braun is smiling. And I suspect, so are many of my top-secret rocket scientist friends in Huntsville.

Maybe you guys could help Duke find the basket too. Or at least a little earlier in the game anyway.… Read the rest

Senator Obama, It’s Time to Come Clean

It was a crisp, fall evening in October, 2000. My U-10 soccer team, The Blue Vipers, were up against the perennial city champs, the Boys Club Hardrollers. They were a juggernaut–I swear some of their players had stubble and drove themselves to the match. I could go on and on about how they illegally recruited by grabbing up the best players from across the city, but that would make me seem small and petty. After all, it’s only a game, right? Right.

We took it to them, though, and at the half, we were leading 2-1. The lads were a little shocked at their success and so was I.… Read the rest

An Interesting Turn of Events

Talk about an interesting turn of events.

Yesterday, Eyegal, Number One and I made our way down to our favorite beautiful old downtown church for a Lenten liturgy fix. I had not adhered very well to my promises this year, and I was eager to make amends. Lent, after all, is not merely the stuff that you must brush off your clothes.

The rain poured hard as the service started, and the sound of it pelting furiously against the roof lent an air of drama to the lectionary readings. The music soared, drawing us away from our selfish, petty concerns and upward and outward toward Higher and Holier Things.… Read the rest

Interesting Feedback

A patient’s wife whom I’ve known for years saw me poke my head out into the waiting room the other day and ran over to give me some feedback on my recent newspaper column.

She cocked her head to one side, tilting it slightly forward, raised a single brow, and without so much as a hint of a smile said, “I saw your column. Now that was interesting.”

Not “Great column.” Not “Nice.” Not “Oh how sweet.” But interesting, very, very interesting.

“Well thank you very much,” I replied, not quite sure whether I had just been complimented or not.… Read the rest

Why I Hate Kentucky

There’s only thing that makes my heart gladder than a Duke win, and that would be a Kentucky loss. In this case, the major whuppin’ at the hands of the Vanderbilt Commodores last night.

Whence comes my ire? Oh, the general cockiness–and the 1978 NCAA final didn’t help. But the biggest reason is related to eyes.

In the summer of 1990, I was a resident in ocular disease at a large clinic in Nashville. I wasn’t sure where I would go after that, so I was in the process of obtaining several state licenses to broaden my options. I thought at the time that Kentucky sounded kinda nice and wasn’t far and that I might be able to find a post-residency position somewhere in The Bluegrass State.… Read the rest

I Won’t Forget the Flowers

As promised, here’s the link to my second community column for The Huntsville Times.

And, once again, they left off the first paragraph in the online edition. For the record, here it is:

“Another Valentine’s Day rolls around, and my mind is drawn back to 1976–and Annie. I sang her song, and it didn’t matter that she was John Denver’s wife because it wasn’t really about her.”

I don’t know why they keep leaving off the first paragraph. I’ll have to ask the editor about that. Fortunately, the print edition was fine, and they even used one of the pictures they had taken instead of the first one I sent in, the one Eyegal calls my “terrorist” passport photo.… Read the rest

Scandalous Stuff

Just a reminder for those of you in the Huntsville area, my 2nd Sunday column will appear in the Forum section of The Huntsville Times this week. I’ll post a link to the online edition as soon as it’s available.

This one will contain many embarrassing tidbits from my past (and present), flashes of 1970s nostalgia, sexual innuendo galore, the usual soaring prose laced with biting humor, Eyegal in all her beauty, glorious, never-before-seen metaphors along with a salute (sort of) to a certain upcoming holiday. All kinds of scandalous stuff, really.

Now that I have your attention, I hope you’ll read it.… Read the rest

No Debate

I understand that there is much debate over which Democrat won Super Tuesday.

But there is no debate as to who got Julio.

And there is certainly no debate as to who won The Tangle in the Triangle.

Barners, better check that broken fence gate before more of ’em get away. And if anyone out there knows any Tarheel fans (I know, I know, but I understand they do exist), please link them to this post so that I may taunt them mercilessly. Thank you.

Roll Tide. Go Duke. Two great tastes that go great together.

… Read the rest

Anytime Is Tornado Time In The South

It’s only February, but it’s already tornado time in The South. I had a feeling it was going to get rough yesterday when I saw all the signs–overcast skies, sticky humidity and temps in the 70s. There were numerous deaths and much damage in Tennessee and Arkansas last night, and early this morning, the bad weather came calling to North Alabama.

I’ve been awake since about 3:00 AM when the sirens went off. There was no damage here in south Huntsville, but areas north and west of the city were apparently hit hard and there may have been some fatalities.… Read the rest

When Life Imitates Art

The phone rang, per usual, at the start of dinner. Probably just another solicitor, I thought.

But then I saw the caller ID: “Walker, Texas Ranger.” It was a solicitor all right, but it occurred to me that this was one that I had better talk to. Or else.

“Howdy. This is Walker, Texas Ranger. No really, it’s Chuck Norris, just calling to put in a word for my good friend, Mike Huckabee. When you go to the polls on Tuesday, remember, Huck is the only true conservative in the field. So, if you want to protect our country from another Soviet invasion, remember–Vote Mike Huckabee!”… Read the rest

Ro Ride, Ro!

A Monday morning mental health break is in order after a week of edgy, political blogging and a weekend of sad news–that’s the way Meg would have wanted it. Behold, Amazing Gracie the Wonderdog:

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I told you she was Bama Beautiful in that houndstooth collar of hers!

Gracie is shown here firing up a victory stogy after the Tide’s 41-17 thrashing of the Vols last October. Little did she know that would be her last one for the season.

Like many a Bama fan, Gracie was disappointed in our anemic offense and poor quarterback play, and she didn’t touch her food for days after that loss to Lo-Mo.… Read the rest

Roll On, Sweet Meg

meg_ingram.jpgThe Huntsville and University of Alabama communities are saddened this morning at the passing of Meg Ingram. Meg was a nursing major and former Bama cheerleader who fought valiantly and mirthfully against a rare form of brain-stem cancer over the last 2 years. She was an inspiration to her family and legion of friends, among them Number One Son who knew her and her sister Madalyn well.

Before she died she asked two things. First, that everyone ditch the traditional black at her funeral and instead wear her favorite color–pink–or, of course, crimson. I know that that her many friends, even those from Auburn, will gladly oblige.… Read the rest