Category: General

My Top Ten Anti-Resolutions for 2008

Why start off 2008 with a laundry list of resolutions that I know I won’t keep? No, no, better to make anti-resolutions, things that I know, absolutely without a doubt, I will never, ever do this year…

1) Serve on another committee. I wasn’t just any committee member. I was a bona fide read-all-the-emails, attend-all-the-meetings, believed-I-could-actually-make-a-difference kind of committee member. I was determined to overcome my natural cynicism and play well with others. Ha! What was I thinking? Eyegal kept telling me: “Careful, Mike, you’re gonna get burned.”

I hate it the way she’s right all the time. Bureaucracies, whether they be at work or church (and sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference), suck.… Read the rest

She’s No Lumberjack’s Wife

All you Fusioneers who are waiting around with bated breath for the reincarnation resurrection of Ocular Fusion into whatever-the-heck-it’s-gonna-become are no doubt starving for something good to read in my absence.

Well, never fear, my friend Jason is here. Jason, former youth minister and now associate minister and right hand man to the Big Kahuna, would be the first to tell you that he’s not afraid to explore the feminine side of things, and of course, these days, there’s no shame in that. So it was no surprise, really, that he freely admits to reading this.

He got one thing wrong, though–she’s no lumberjack’s wife.… Read the rest

Registration, Please

policestop1.jpgI hate to do it, but I’m going to have to ask for registration prior to any future comments. I’ve had some malicious spam that has slipped through my Super-Duper Askimet Spam Zapper the past two days, both times apparently resulting in some corruption of my WordPress files.

For you 35 or so regular commenters, it’s really no big deal. You just do a one-time registration (no one besides me will see your name or email), then you’ll receive a password. When you log back in you’ll have the option to change the password to one of your choice, and then all you have to do is ask your browser to remember the password when it prompts you.… Read the rest

Uh, Hey Vols

Uh, hey Vols. Uh, hey Vols. Uh, hey Vols.

We just beat the, well, you know, crap out of you.

Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer, give’em, well, you know, heck Alabama!

Roll Tide, Roll!

UPDATE 10/22: For those of you from other parts of the country and world who may be unsure of what I’m talking about, here’s the Full Monty version of the “Rammer Jammer” from field level. This is what it sounded like to Phil Fulmer.

Take a good listen, Tommy–you’re next.

Read the rest

Persona Non Bloggus

There is a time for everything, a season for every activity under heaven:

…a time to be silent, and a time to speak.

Ecclesiastes 3, v.1 and v.7

Two years ago yesterday, I launched out onto the “bloggy cybersea.” Somehow I managed to survive the use of that horrible turn of phrase and go on to write 526 other posts in 64 categories which generated 4,195 comments. Some of those comments came from me, a good deal of them from pesky spammers hawking everything from cheap, cheesy porn to counterfeit Nike shoes (those have been fried for the most part by my Super-Duper Askimet Spam Zapper and don’t figure into the total count), but most came from the likes of you, my beloved Fusioneers, whom I have come to appreciate very much.… Read the rest

Video Angst

Apparently it’s not just baseball managers who fret over stolen signals and suffer video angst. In the wake of the New England Patriot/Bill Belichick imbroglio over sideline videotaping, the Georgia Bulldogs have closed their football practices for the first time in seven years.

Why now, you ask? Well, as the Atlanta Journal and Constitution reports, Crimson Tide HC Nick Saban used to work as (are you ready for this?) the defensive coordinator for Bill Belichick during his Cleveland Browns days. And to top it off, Saban and the Dolphins were accused of stealing signals last year from none other than the New England Patriots (the NFL investigated and found the accusation to be baseless).… Read the rest

I’m An Optimist–I Just Have to Work At It

In case you haven’t noticed, I try to remain fundamentally cheerful and optimistic on this blog. I figure that the world is full of enough overwrought, rant-filled, spiteful fare, so I aim to provide a little counterweight. Plus, it’s an exercise in self-discipline, for I am by nature fundamentally pessimistic and sometimes downright morose.

So, this morning, I pause to take in a lungful of crisp, autumn-tinged air and give thanks for the following:

  • My wife, who rather than committing me to the local mental hospital, playfully joined in my craziness last night and helped me track down and destroy that nasty wood roach (the mere sight of which caused me to go apopleptic) which managed to slip inside when I opened the door to the garage
  • Number One, who, despite being involved in two, count’em, TWO car wrecks (plus a close encounter as a pedestrian with another car which he has not seen fit to tell me about yet–I have my sources) since arriving in Tuscaloosa, is nonetheless in good health.
Read the rest

Beware: Another Soccer Post Coming

We may have layed an egg at Copa with our inexperienced crew, but our U-20s are making some noise north of the border at the more junior World Cup.

Here’s some video of our 6-1 trouncing of Poland, including Adu’s neat hat trick.

Next up: USA v. Brazil. Adu v. Pato–should be a good one.

UPDATE 7/7: USA 2 Brazil 1! The U-20 Stars and Stripes book passage to the Round of 16, and Brazil, well, they’ll just have to wait and see if they advance. The lethal combination of Adu to Altidore did the damage up top, and US keeper Chris Seitz had a magnificent match, deflecting and/or smothering a barrage of dangerous opportunities.… Read the rest

It’s the Increments, Stupid

Yesterday was “hill day.” That’s my 6-6.5 mile early morning run which includes a mile or so of various quad-challenging inclines. Hill day, along with my weekly track session and long weekend run, form the backbone of what I hope will be a run-up to another marathon in December.

Usually, I’m pretty winded by the time I reach the top of the hills and have been in the habit of walking a few meters in recovery. But yesterday, as I topped each peak, there was no need to stop and catch my breath. Like Forrest Gump, I just kept right on running.… Read the rest

Be a Whateva

A few years back, after noting my small knack for turning out a good phrase or two every now and then, I thought to myself: I coulda been a writa!

Then I heard about something called “blogging.” And now, nearly two years lata, I am a writa!

Well, sorta.

Substitute “writa” for “singa” and I coulda been the one asking this question.

Please take the time to read Cary Tennis’ advice to this wannabe diva. It’s some of the best, most practical, most loving guidance that I’ve seen dished out in a long time.

Then, turn off the reality show and start creating some reality of your own.… Read the rest

What a Difference a Year Can Make

Last year this time, I was singing the blues over the US National Team’s anemic performance in the 2006 World Cup and wondering if Bruce Arena had traveled with the team as a coach or merely a spectator.

One year later, I’m watching this immaculate strike over and over and over and allowing myself to dream a little about our prospects in South Africa come 2010.

The US’s come-from-behind 2-1 victory against Mexico in Sunday’s CONCACAF Gold Cup Final may prove to be a watershed moment in the Stars and Stripes’ march toward the next World Cup. Interim-now-permanent Head Coach Bob Bradley has brought new blood and a fresh perspective to a team that was mired in a mid-90s mindset.… Read the rest

Verbal Sprawl

The more the words,
the less the meaning,
and how does that profit anyone?

–Ecclesiastes 6:11

How ironic that those words were spoken by someone named The Preacher.

We’re preparing to enter a season of senior sermons, baccalaureate services, keynote speeches and prayerful send offs. May all who dare to speak do so with modesty, a sense of the occasion, and a modicum of “fitly spoken” words.

Just say “no” to verbal sprawl.

Read the rest