Category: Culture

A Southern Halloween

grim-reaper.jpgHave you ever met a ghost?

I haven’t (as far as I know). But that doesn’t mean they don’t exist. My friend Jeff believes he has met some ghosts and offers up some sobering thoughts and Halloween reflections on these denizens of the afterworld in his essay, “Stumbling in Endor.” I felt a shiver or two running up my spine (at least I think that’s all it was) when I read this, and I bet you will too.

With its storied tradition of gothic tragedy, it figures the South would produce more than its share of tortured souls wandering the earth in search of redemption and release.… Read the rest

On Any Given Day

ticket.jpgLast Saturday morning, our family awoke at the crack of dawn and headed down to Game Day in T-town. It was only a 2 ½ hour drive from Huntsville to Tuscaloosa, but for all practical purposes it might as well have been 40 years.

I say that because that’s what it felt like–1966. After the obligatory pregame meal at Dreamland BBQ, we arrived on the beautiful, oak-lined, University of Alabama Quad, bordered by Denny Chimes to the south and Gorgas Library to the north. The stereotypical Southern fixation with the past was never more perfectly illustrated than by the Crimson-clad legions bivouacking on the expansive green, reveling in the memories of past teams and glory years gone by.… Read the rest

A Red State of Mind–A Good Read

The stack of books on my nightstand is about to get one louder, uh, I mean higher. My blogging friend Nancy French has a new book coming out October 9th–A Red State of Mind: How a Catfish Queen Reject Became a Liberty Belle. If that down home and intriguing title doesn’t grab you, maybe the paperdoll cutout with the big hair will:

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You gotta admit, that took some guts. The book chronicles the adventures of a conservative, evangelical former beauty queen reject from Paris, Tennessee as she plunges headlong into the deep, Blue State waters of New York City and Philadelphia.… Read the rest

A Tale of Two Hats

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The weekend has concluded, the Tide hung in there for a while but didn’t escape from “The Swamp” and “Wide Right Jesus” is still signaling “no good.”

But unless the world screeches to a halt and stops spinning on its axis, the Crimson Nation should be be smiling next week at this time after dismantling one of the nation’s most feeble college football teams, the Duke Blue Devils. I suspect the boys from Durham are making a handsome sum for showing up in Tuscaloosa for their thrashing. Duke lost their Homecoming game 37-0 to UVa on Saturday, so look for Saturday’s game to get butt ugly very quickly.… Read the rest

I Am Not a Prude. Am I?

churchlady1.jpgI am not a prude. Nor am I a teetotaler. Not even close. I believe God made the body– “and it was good.” I would have made a horrible Gnostic.

Still, some of this made me blush (be sure to watch the video clips and Joe Beam’s interview with MSNBC’s Lester Holt–who, by the way, attends the Manhattan Church of Christ).

A necessary and overdue corrective to the church’s longstanding “bury thy head in the sand” approach to human sexuality or just a little too much information, thank you very much?

Like a lot of things, I guess, it depends on who you talk to.… Read the rest

The Church of Football

churchsign.jpgThe South is a curious amalgam of fried food and sweet tea, trashy trailer park tragedy, dark gothic tales, hell, fire and brimstone and, of course, the ever-present, all-consuming, life-giving Church of Football.

Oh sure, there’s football in other parts of the country, but does anyone else come close to matching the faithful fanaticism of a Deep South Game Day? The Church of Football has it’s own liturgy–the parking lot fellowship meal, the processional to the house of worship, the gathering of the congregation, colorful vestments and the common chants and cheers. Touchdowns, of course, are the holiest sacrament, and in the ecstasy of celebrating another six points, congregants, if only for a few transcendent moments, forget their troubles and woes and are transported into high, heavenly places.… Read the rest

A Hoover High Reprise

As most regular readers know, Ocular Fusion 2.0 tends to be a non-controversial blog. Eyegal tells me that I need more “edge,” and that she would like to see me post on more “hot topics.” Well, she of all people should know that when you get down to my core, “I’m a lover, not a fighter.”

Still, I’m up for a good scrap now and then, especially if one comes knocking at my door. My recent post on the MTV reality show “Two-a-Days” featuring Hoover High School’s football team didn’t stir up much trouble when I originally posted it, aside from the interesting discussion that Jon and I had on the pros and cons of allowing cuss words to be heard in one’s house.… Read the rest

A Music Manifesto

apple_ipod-v30g_0.jpgI wish I had thought of this. But I’m glad that my friend Mike the PharmD (that stands for “Pharmacy Dude”) did.

The ubiquitous iPod is a necessary accessory for today’s tech-savvy, music-loving teenagers. Our boys each have one. In all three cases they worked and saved and payed for part of theirs with a little help from Eyegal and me. They have enjoyed them greatly, but there have been a few “issues” which have needed to be addressed from time to time.

Mike the PharmD, possessing a more sound and sober mind than I, anticipated many of these “issues” prior to purchase.… Read the rest

The Death of “Good Mornin'”

It’s a given that if you’re taking a walk or a run on a Saturday morning in Alabama (or just about anyday anywhere in the South for that matter) and you meet up with one of your neighbors, that you’ll exchange a greeting of some sort. A head nod, a lift of the hand, a “hey,” or the classic “good mornin'” are all socially acceptable salutations. To acknowledge and greet a fellow passerby is as much a Southern staple as barbeque, sweet tea, high school football and Wednesday night church.

Or so I thought.

This past Saturday I was nearing the half way mark of my morning run when I spotted a speed-walking, fifty-something woman clad in colorful, cheerful spandex coming around a corner directly into my path.… Read the rest

Hoover High Lights

om.jpgWhenever we Alabamians hear that our beloved Yellowhammer State is in the news, our first reaction is to usually to cringe–“what now?”

Well, for better or worse, Alabama has made it again, this time in the form of MTV’s “Two-a-Days” a reality show which documents the fortunes of the Hoover High School (near Birmingham) Buccaneers football team, winner of four of the last five state 6-A football titles and the current preseason #1 in the USA TODAY Super 25.

We know a little something about Hoover High up Huntsville way. Our Grissom High Tigers are usually the ones who make the first round of the state playoffs only to be served up as Buccaneer bait.… Read the rest

What, Me Worry?

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The photo is of Number One Son as he prepares to drive off for his “last first day” of public high school. He’s a member of the mighty 2007 senior class at Virgil I. Grissom High School, and he sure is exuding the confidence that flows from such a lofty station in life. Another reason he’s smiling is that he’s just glad his hair finally grew back in time for his senior portrait.

Number One and his brothers are Gen Nexters or Millennials, a generation that has been receiving a lot of attention lately in the media. For some, this generation reminds them of “The Greatest Generation” which came of age during World War II.… Read the rest

The Assimilation Continues

borg-18527.jpgIt’s been an eventful week here at Ocular Fusion. First, I was graced with a visit by the Winged Goddess of Victory herself (I think we all know her name, don’t we?). Then I was the victim of a vicious attack of flying spam, necessitating the installation of the new and improved, all purpose, Super-Duper Askimet Anti-Spam Shield and Bug Zapper (so far, 70 pieces of fried spam in 48 hrs).

But, no matter what I do, the assimilation continues.

Here’s my latest VIP visitor:… Read the rest

From Swoosh to Spam in No Time Flat

1559606_340_1116081430036-spam.jpgI thought that “getting Swooshed” would be the greatest thing that ever happened to me. Visions of free running shoes, endorsement contracts, commercials and billboards were dancing like Oregon Waffles in my middle-age, ever-balding head.

Instead, I went from Swoosh to spam in no time flat.

It all started when those pesky and creepy little search bot worm thingies started crawling all over my site a few days ago. Both Google and Yahoo (Inktomisearch.com) stop by at least daily, Yahoo sometimes more often. The result was a coordinated spam attack between 10:15 and 10:50 A.M. yesterday which launched eight cash-seeking missles that landed in the comment section of my various Nike posts.… Read the rest

I’ve Been Swooshed

In mob circles, it’s known as becoming a “Made man.” You’ve shown loyalty to the family through the years, doing all the dirty deeds you’ve been asked to do. Finally, after paying your dues, somebody notices. Suddenly, your suits get silkier, your shoes shinier, you receive VIP treatment at the dry cleaners and get the best seats at all the good restaurants with no reservations. Usually “being made” is the pinnacle of a mobster’s career–unless you’re Joe Pesci’s character Tommy DeVito in the movie Goodfellas.

Now I’m no mafioso, but I am a shoe nerd. And we have our day too, you know.… Read the rest